Living Life Honestly

There are times in our lives when everything’s going great and we want more of God…you know more of the GOOD more of his BLESSINGS more of his STRENGTH,
so we ask him to work in our lives. 

But we overlook something vital…
-in order for God to do this…we must become weak for him to become strong

And when this truth begins to unfold and we see what might have to happen in order for God to bring those blessings…
we find ourselves in the middle of something far beyond what we ever hoped for and we cry out to God from the valley.

We wonder how he could’ve ever misunderstood blessings for suffering strength for weakness or the hills for the valley…

We find our self broken with our ourselves in the middle of a valley but THIS friend is where God works…


Let me invite you into our story a bit deeper…
just beware it may cause you some conflict and even bring forth a rush of uncertainty because honestly that’s what faith under fire does…

And please know I’m not here to give you answers to all of these uncertainties.
I’m merely here to let you know that if you’re feeling a bit worn down by life, a bit unsure of what’s to come or a bit unseen…I’m here too.


Joe and I came to Dallas nine years ago. 
At the time God was calling Joe, I was resisting.
And honestly it was because we had served God for over twenty years and I was ready for an easier assignment. 

I wanted blessings without suffering. 

I wanted an easier assignment with a beautiful house, a big front porch to drink our tall glass of tea on. 

I wanted an assignment near family, we’d lived apart from our family for so many years and I longed to spend holidays with our family surrounding us. 

I wanted to serve God in a healthy church that was full of blessings.

Friend, truthfully I even sketched these desires on the pages of a journal asking God to give them to us.

Because we had spent twenty or more years serving God and depending on him in ways and honestly,
I was worn out. 
Tired of being surrounded by brokenness, tired of being hurt even by those inside the church’s walls and ready for him to rescue us…
I felt we deserved a break from the struggle, relief from this kind of living…


Have you ever been here?

I’m sure you have because we all have battles we’re fighting…
Some in the walls of our homes and some waging so big inside of our hearts and minds we long for our brokenness to be redeemed. 

But friend, the way God does his work isn’t ever the way we would and thank goodness it’s not.

Because nine years ago if we’d followed my leading, my wants oh what a mess we’d be in…
We would be left celebrating others’ stories of bravery and we would have missed the story he’s writing in our lives. 


Sure, we’re breaking but we’re also healing. 


Because sometimes friend we can break from this kind of trial so much we see his   testimony happening within us as he puts us back together. 

And that’s what’s life about sometimes, isn’t it?

It’s about him being seen in the reflection of our lives more than us…

And I’ll admit lately I’ve felt so many times as if my heart couldn’t break any more until I remember God knows how to put hearts back together because after all he is the maker of them all…

So, I’ve been walking through these days a whole lot different lately realizing this is where true blessings get birthed…
Because friend, even though our feeds are full of people ‘living their dreams’ buried beneath their bright and shiny filters are hearts full of brokenness too. 

Inside each of us lies a deep need for God who restores us through and through. 


When Joe’s cancer first began and we first learned of how they were going to aggressively treat it, Joe asked his Oncologist a question that surfaces almost daily.

He said, 
Doctor if you’re killing what’s killing me, what’s going to bring me back to life?

Because friend, when life feels like it’s crushing down on us so hard it’s pressing the life out of us
-we all want to know how we’re going to survive…

And to our surprise the Doctor responded to Joe with…’Joe your blood will..’

That’s right even in the midst of the treatments killing every one of his cells somewhere long ago, God made a way for Joe’s blood to save his life.



You see when our arms are lifted up in complete brokenness-
this is where God puts lives back together. 

And friend it’s in these seasons of suffering when God crashes into our lives and leaves not even one ember of the fire on us as he walks us out the other side… 
Yes, I’ve felt weaker than ever friend but it’s in these times of utter exhaustion God is working the most. 

And it’s here we uncover his blessings, blessings so different than the world offers and yet felt so much more deeply too. 
Because these are the kind of blessings that heal broken marriages, bring children back home to God and the kind of blessings that heal broken bodies. 

Because God always brings unusual blessings.


And nine years later I can truthfully say
-we are seeing these blessings…
We are experiencing restoration all around us and even within ourselves down into our cells. 

So friend, if you’re in the middle of something and wondering if God got it all wrong I encourage you to come along side of heaven and worship Him. 

Press play on that playlist and remember his goodness and faithfulness…

Because whether you’re in the valley or soaring over mountain tops God is worthy of praise…

And know sweet friend you are never standing in this alone.









6 Replies to “Living Life Honestly”

  1. Love the word…Would you be free from your passion and pride
    There’s power in the blood, power in the blood
    Come for a cleansing to Calvary’s tide
    There’s wonderful power in the blood
    There is power, power, wonder-working power
    In the blood of the Lamb
    There is power, power, wonder-working power
    In the precious blood of the Lamb.

    Joe’s blood will bring him back to life because of whose blood flows within him.
    Thanks again for your vulneralbility as you and Joe walk this incredible journey!
    I love you!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ruthann, I totally am in awe of how God is speaking through you and Joe’s medical situations to see God glorified through it all! You continuously see and worship even when the tidal waves of brokenness are so overloading! Continuing to pray for both of you, but also for myself to open my heart more to God’s guidance and direction in my life! Love y’all so much as family and God’s family! ❤🕊🙇‍♂️❤🕊🙇‍♂️❤🕊🙇‍♂️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ahhh thank you so much! God truly is carrying us. Believe me some days it’s an ugly cry through worship though. He’s with us through the hills and the valleys.


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