Thursday’s Thread

There’s a saying somewhere out there that says….
some people feel the rain’, 

Well, I’m one of those people.

I feel the rain, not merely the wetness of it but I feel it deep within my bones. 

All of my knee surgeries in junior high are what I have to thank for this.

The Dr told me I was born with broken knee caps….

It’s something that was handed down to me…who gets gifted with brokenness?

This confirmed the brokenness Id been limping around on for months…

The diagnosis also validated what I feared -that I was indeed born broken.

There’s more to this story….you see,
I grew up afraid of love-
Terrified to open my heart up to someone who might one day cause it unbearable pain. 
I was scared that the person I fell in love with would eventually fall out of love with me. 
I feared with everything I was –I’d never be enough.

And I was certain two people couldn’t stay in love for a lifetime.

Id seen how love could spoil and turn into bitternesshow it shattered hearts within its spaces.

So, I decided to not get in its way…and declared I’d never marry. 

But then something happened…
someone‘s kindness captured me and showed me the other side of love.

He reached inside my wounded heart and loved every bit of brokenness I owned

He remained faithful even when I believed a man never could…He restored my view of men and has helped heal my once shattered pieces.

He and God together are showing me what love really is...oh to feel it even in the midst of the aches it can bring.

…even in the hard & holy moments when life gets messy and love hurts, I am reminded how loving something can also bring the ache of brokenness with it.  

It’s funny how this is…
But its real…as soon my hip and knee start to ache I’ll hear the pitter patter of raindrops outside my window.

And my heart swells two sizes bigger as rain has a way of doing this to me.

It’s as if the pain shooting up my leg is numbed from the beauty of a rainy day.

The pressure that builds up somehow escapes when I’m listening to the drumming of rain.

It’s as if rain has always had a special way of keeping my heart in rhythm and reminding me how even the best things in life come with some aches and pains. 

There’s something about loving others and feeling the coming on of rain that has a way of reminding us just how human we really are…

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